New Relationship Strong Foundation Tips (How to Create a Strong Foundation for Your Relationship)

Building a strong foundation for your relationship from the beginning is a smart idea. You are wise to be seeking this advice at this stage, as making the right moves now can mean years of happiness in the future. Here are some tips to make it happen!

Don't fake it

Many people feel that in order to make someone like them, they have to change themselves somehow, or become an actor, putting forward a false front to impress their new partner. In reality, though, you need to be who you are. If you want a partner who likes you for who you are, then you need to be who you are from the beginning.

This reduces stress and tension later on, because the real you will start to show through no matter what your efforts at faking it. And, when that happens, your partner will realize that you aren't who they thought you were. If they then don't like the real you, you will go through the stress of a breakup, and have to start all over again with someone else. Many people then repeat the same mistake of faking it, with the same result down the road again.

In reality, then, it is much less stressful and far more rewarding to just be yourself from the beginning. If your date likes it, that's great! You have the potential for a good relationship. If they don't like it, that's ALSO GOOD, because you have not started a relationship with someone that will just blow up on your anyway.

Your mother may have told you that "honesty's the best policy." It may sound trite and old fashioned, but in relationships, this is still the golden rule. Be yourself and find someone who likes you for yourself and you may discover a lifetime of happiness together.

Take your time

There's always a lot of enthusiasm in a new relationship. You will believe that you're madly in love, and want to spend every moment you can with your new partner.

But jumping into bed right away or spending every moment together right away isn't the best way to go.

Start out by holding hands and gradually build up from there.

Don't cut off your relationships with your friends. You should still go out with your friends, as this will help to preserve your sense of identity. Getting a break from your new partner every once in a while will give you and your new partner time to reflect on your new relationship, and will actually help make it stronger in the long run.

Stay friends

Friendship is the foundation on which any happy, long-term relationship is built.

While romance and passion are important, friendship is the foundation stone of your relationship. Without friendship, you wouldn't be able to stay together for long.

As time goes on, though, we take each other for granted. We then start to criticize some of their behaviors in detail. The old saying "familiarity builds contempt" is certainly true in any long term relationship, and it can kill your relationship if you don't watch out.

Show your partner the same respect you would show any of your other friends. If you both do this, you will go a long way to having a long term, loving, and happy relationship.

How to cope with conflict

Conflict is an inevitable part of any human relationship. We all have different opinions and habits, some of which inevitably bother other people. In a close, romantic, relationship, this leads to conflicts, especially when the other person isn't flexible or understanding. By not being fake in the beginning, conflict will be minimized, but will still inevitably happen.

How you handle it depends on your attitude. If you have an attitude of inflexibility, and that your way is always right, this will lead to disaster.

You have to pick your battles wisely. Realize what is important and what is trivial. However, even for trivial matters, you need to have a good perspective, and have open lines of communication with your partner. There has to be give and take and compromise, otherwise your relationship won't work out.

Don't ignore problems and irritations. If something your partner does really bothers you, you need to sit down and discuss the situation in an open, kind, and gentle attitude.

Don't let irritations sit and build up resentment. If you address them early, they will stay small and be easier to work out. If you stew on them, there will come a boiling point, and then it will be much harder to resolve.

This is especially a problem for men, because men don't deal well with their emotions, and have a tendency to let things simmer. They try to ignore the issue, but, in the end, it usually creates so much anger and resentment it suddenly blows up like a volcano.

So, men, even though you would rather NOT deal with problems and conflict and emotions, meeting them head on when the problem first arises will go a long way to solving it with the least pain and strain possible.

Educate yourself on how relationships work

You should invest some time in reading interviews with people who've been married for 50+ years. They have a lot of good tips they can give you - after all, they've made a success of their relationship, so they obviously are doing many things right. Reading these interviews can give you some insight into what it takes to stay together this long.

Also, read some good books and articles on the secrets to relationship success. Don't obsess over this, but a few good looks and some articles will help point you in the right direction.

Remember that lasting love and making a long term relationship work isn't always easy. This is sometimes hard to understand in our society of fast food and instant gratification, but the effort is well worth it, as those who have made their long term relationships work can testify.

You're lucky if you're just starting a new relationship, because if you take the above advice, you will be way ahead of the game and well on your way to a lifetime of love and happiness by avoiding the common relationship pitfalls that many people fall into.

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